"What happened?"

"You know how it feels. . . when all your teeth are falling out? And at first you don't notice, but then you do and you find out that they're really far apart. . . And then one day. . . You don't have any teeth anymore. Yeah, it was like that. . ."

~Carol, a Wild Thing~

These Things

Well, nothing has really happened much since my last post.

I went to Tahoe with some of my friends this past weekend, and it was so much fun. Laying on the beach watching the sunset with them just seemed so unreal. It was like we are on the edge of something, and we knew something big was about to happen, but we were just enjoying the time that we had until it did happen. I guess that could be taken in both a good and a bad way, but either way, it was a great time had by all. My two friends Sara and Olivia, who both just happen to be italian, made us dinner while we were there. It was a delicious Alfedo Chicken meal with green beans and bread. Yum!

This was easily the best picture taken during the trip. We were all trying to pose as those laughing kids in the JC Penny's ads. I love my friends :)

Take it from me. Cause I've seen things that you've taught about.

"And to answer your question... Yes. Yes I'm missing you. What, are you surprised? Did you really think I would say something different? After all you've heard me say; after all you've seen me do, you think I would say differently. I think that, right there, is what I never understood about you. You always seemed to figure out every single minuscule detail that I tried to hide, yet you wouldn't know a grenade if it went off in your face. Is that a tactic or are you really that daft? No answer. You never answered my questions. Never. So now I'm here trying to answer yours; practically vomiting my insides all over this dirty, sweat-stained concrete, and you couldn't care less! You know how I know that? That you don't care?! Because you're not here... You're off somewhere in Chicago with the rest of your life paving a road of solid gold ahead of you. And I'm still here, still talking to this decrepit punching bag, still wishing I had never picked up this monster."

If every word I said could make you laugh, I'd talk forever.

If there is one thing that I will say about myself, it is that I love to laugh. Laughter, to me, is a way of expressing emotions. What you laugh at changes from day to day, depending on what happened over the last 24 hours and how you dealt with it. It changes from who you talk to, to what music you listened to; from how much sleep you got the night before to what the weather is currently like. Basically, laughter is such a simple action that is affected by a complicated mosh pit of factors.

Today was such a good day! I got up, feeling refreshed from a good night of sleep, to drive to class with a really good friend of mine. Class was short, we joked around a lot, and all was well. Then two of my best friends hung out at my house for a while, eating pizza and playing video games. Then something fantastic happened. Right after they had left, I received a call from the local PacSun store, which I had applied to, saying that they would like to schedule an interview for tomorrow. I am so excited for that, and it completely made my day. But if that wasn't enough, I topped the day off with a surprise birthday party for yet another one of my amazing friends. The party was such a success and it was so much fun.

But one thing I noticed about tonight was how much I was laughing. Sure, I laugh a lot anyway, but tonight just seemed like the right time to laugh. I was getting a break from how things have been going lately, and I was in such a positive mood, I was so ready to just party. Now I'm pretty sure I was quite annoying with my very loud and obnoxious guffaw, but I really enjoyed myself. And as tired as I am, I am feeling this tranquility that tells me that everything is alright. That I'm doing ok. That no matter how I mess up, or what mistakes I make, or what wrong decisions I may execute, it's ok. It's ok.

So, as much as I don't want this day to be over, goodnight.

I am, I am a machine.

So remember my post the other day about instruments and how I said that I wanted to learn the harmonica? Well, today I was looking online at new iPhone cases (mine is being stupid and tearing...) and remembered that with the money I had left on Amazon, I could probably purchase a pretty decent harmonica. So I told my dad I was looking at harmonicas, and he proceeds to tell me that we have one in the house. And I said "POR QUE?!?". Well, no, I didn't, because "por que" means "why?" in spanish, and that just doesn't make sense. But anyway, he found the harmonica for me, and said that he bought it for my sister a while ago, but she never uses it. So I cleaned it off and claimed it as my own.

I love it! It sounds so beautiful even though it's a fairly cheap harmonica. Still, I spent a long time today trying to crank out some hardcore blues jams on the thing. Actually, maybe they weren't hardcore, but they were still awesome.

Whale Wars

I was watching "Whale Wars" with my dad earlier today, a show about a group of Anti-Whalers, who sail international waters look for the Japanese whaling boats, throwing rancid butter and booby traps on the whaling boats in an attempt to stop whaling. Now, I'm not too sure about the rules of this show, per se. It seems like the Japanese have all the right in the world to whale if they want to, but the Anti-Whalers, let's call them contras ;), feel that it's barbaric and inhumane, so they try their hardest to stop their opposition.

On the last few episodes, the contras had caught up to the mother ship of the Japanese whaling fleet, the Nise Maru, but were having trouble keeping the ship in sight. So they sent a very small, very fast ship, The Ady Gil, to follow the Nise Maru and try to hinder it going any further. After a few tricks by the Ady Gil, it seems they have slowed down the mother ship, but have exhausted their fuel in the process. Now they must wait 3 days for a friendly ship to arrive and refuel them.

But as they wait around, recalling their wins and watching the other Japanese ships pass by, they realize that one of the recon ships is sailing dangerously near to them, and eventually it crashes into the Ady Gil, slicing the ship in two. The crew is fine, but now there are only two ships left in the contra fleet. Now, for some reason I can't seem to understand, in the next episode the captain of the sunken Ady Gil is going to try and board the Japanese Recon ship for what reason? We don't know, but we have to watch to find out.

What I don't get is, why? I understand the whales are important, but does one really feel the need to fight so hard for their cause that they want to put human life in danger? It would be one thing if the cause was about humans, but it's not, it's about whales. When does a cause become too ridiculous to fight for? When does retaliation become too much? When human life is at stake? Or do we have to wait until a life is actually lost? Or maybe it gets to be too much when the human emotions just can't take it anymore?

I'm not sure. I think that it's much more complicated than that, but right now I think I'm done with this post. Sometimes, a cause is just too much to fight for. The question is, what cause is worth going through hell to fight?

I. Prelude

I am a musician. Well, in the lightest sense of the word. I play the bass guitar, and I have been for about two and a half years now, and yet as long as I've been playing it, I'm not all that good. That is because I just don't practice enough. I've always liked the bass guitar, and I've always thought it was an interesting instrument. It sure is an important one. If the drums are like the heart beat of a song, the bass is the lungs. You just can't keep a song alive for very long without some sort of bass sounding instrument. I've also loved how easy the bass is to pick up and play. Once you figure out the basics, anyone can do it, even though it takes years and years of practice to really get good at it. I'm proud to play the bass guitar. I enjoy slappin' da bass! I think I've never seen the bass as a good solo instrument, even though it can be.

But over the past year I've become really interested in other instruments and genres. I really want to learn the piano, and I signed up to take it in my senior year, but they didn't give me the class, which really made me sad. I think the piano is a beautiful instrument, and it would be awesome to learn how to play it.

I've also been bugging my parents to go take me to see the San Francisco Symphony. I love orchestras and symphonies, and I would be just giddy to go actually see a professional one. I really like violins, but I am totally amazed by the cello. To me, the cello is probably the most beautiful instrument that has ever been created by man. The sound of it just cuts through the air like a knife, yet at the same time it's soothing and allows you to enjoy the euphoria it gives off.

Another instrument I've really been wanting to play lately is the harmonica. I was watching a certain comedian play his guitar, the harmonica, and tell his jokes all at the same time, and even though his jokes were funny, I found myself focusing on how good the harmonica sounded. I'd really like to buy one. They aren't that expensive, so maybe soon? In the meantime I'll just sit here plucking away on my bass guitar. Ohhhh, yeah.