"And sometimes... When I'm peeling potatoes..."

The quote at the top is from a television show called The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack, an absolutely hilarious idiotic cartoon that my friend Amanda got me hooked on. In one episode, Flapjack joins the Navy in hopes of an adventurous life, but comes to find out that you must work your way up to the top of the basically vertical cliff of achievement. He finds a man named Jesus at the bottom of the boat peeling potatoes, which is where this quote comes from. I think it's hysterical when you actually hear him speak, and I took the liberty of annoying my friends for about two hours with it last night, so I think it deserves some sort of spotlight here.

Well, I've been really confused lately. For a long time actually. And it seems like every time I finally come to terms with the way things are, something comes along and screws me over. It slaps a piece of duct tape over my eyes, punches me in the face once or twice, spins me around a few times, and then sends me off as a blind, bleeding idiot to find my way in the disorienting darkness.

You liked that analogy, didn't you? I know I did.

So, in order to distract myself from problems that could very well be imaginary, I've been thinking of just random things. One of which has been a Harry Potter video game which I would like to see created. Alright, let's see if you can handle this: You get to create your own student at Hogwarts, and depending on the "obvious" attributes you give to your avatar, you will be placed in one of the four houses. I think you know what those are, but if you don't, you have Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Slytherin, and Hufflepuff. I don't think I spelled some of those right, but you get the point. Anyway, you would have a single player mode in which you go through years 1-7 and learn the spells that you want to learn depending on what classes you sign up for.

Now I know what you're thinking, what happens after you finish year 1-7 in single player? Well, that same character that you played through single player can be transferred to multiplayer where you can go onto an online Harry Potter world including Hogwarts, Hogsmeade, the Forbidden Forest, Diagon Alley, and maybe some other places included in the game.

There would be quidditch, dueling, bad guys, and competitions galore. It would be awesome! It would also probably be much too expensive to create, but maybe one day.

So today has been a good day so far. I celebrated my sisters birthday with my family and girlfriend by going to Olive Garden and having an amazing lunch! I got my sister a journal to write in and an epic pen to write with, and my girlfriend was nice enough to make her a headband and a skirt. She was really happy about it. So happy birthday Anna :)

And we'll all float on alright.

So nothing interesting has happened lately. Just more of the same old stuff, really.

I've been taking a class at the junior college I'll be attending this fall, and the class is alright I guess. The subject, Abnormal Psychology, is interesting, but the teacher would have to be dead to be any more boring. Or would that be more interesting, since a zombie would be teaching our class? And I've got nothing against the guy at all, he just isn't the most interesting lecturer.

As I was walking through the campus earlier today, I thought of something. Every school that I've gone to so far has really felt like a home. Somewhere safe where you can learn and spend some time with some good people. So far, Las Po really doesn't feel like a home, especially since I have to commute every day to get there. I think that's one thing I've always thought would be cool about going to a four year; the fact that you live there, or right near there, and therefore the school ends up being a sort of home.

From how I feel right now, I'll be glad to get to a four year as soon as I can, but in the meantime I'm going to make the best out of a situation in which I really don't have an opinion on at the moment. I'll make myself be positive, because I can do that! 'Cause I'm awesome. Bam!

Has Needs, Will Work.

I need a job.

That's basically all that there is to it. I've been wanting a job since I turned 17, which was last September, and even though I haven't tried my absolute hardest, I can't seem to find anything. Some of my other friends had a really tough time finding a job too, but some of them have been successful. And even those who weren't at least got a call back for an interview. Not to sound all "Woe is me", but I've not heard anything from any of the places I've applied to.

So I need to step up my game. I need money if I'm going to keep on going places with my friends. I need money to buy essentials and luxuries. But it's not just about the money; I need a job so I can learn how the system works. I need and want that sort of life experience, and working will help me grow as a person.

One thing that has really motivated me lately to get a job is my mother. She really has this thing about people getting a job when they are able, and even though I don't understand why she's so firm about this, I think it's time I respected her opinion and looked harder for a job.

Besides, I feel a little left out that my friends are working and making money like adults while I'm still at home trying to find something to do like a kid. I don't mind being a kid, but as it's my time to start growing up, I want to do just that.

So employers, look out! I'm a-coming! (Oh, and if you've got any suggestions, send them my way please!)

I lift my eyes to you. I won't look very far 'cause you'll be there with open arms...

I was at band practice last night, and as I was playing a song and reading the lyrics, my mind drifted to the times when Jesus Christ was walking the earth. I wholeheartedly believe that God, Jesus, Satan, Heaven, Hell, and the rest of all that really exists. I believe that Jesus died for my sins, and I've accepted him into my heart. You could even go as far to say I'm a Christian. And you may say "but how can you believe in something that you cannot see, has evidence against, and is quickly fading into the background of the world's mind?" Well, I can and I do, so I guess that's all there is to say about that then.

But think about how life would have been when Jesus was actually walking on the same ground as us.

I mean, for one, the guy spoke in parables, or riddles basically. I would've thought that the guy was pulling my leg every time He was trying to teach me a life lesson. He was always surrounded by crowds of believers, non believers, and skepticalists (oooh, new word!). There were poor people, middle class people, rich people there. He saw prostitutes, disease-ridden low lifes, outcasts, workers, students, preachers, apostles, prisoners, criminals, housewives, and children. An enormous freak show followed Him wherever he went, and He accepted them.

Now, I'm not one for crazy stuff like that. I will personally try to stay away from as many prostitutes and criminals as I can. So if I lived in His time, I would probably be scared to follow Him around. Then again, if He was walking around preaching to people, and I loved Him like I do now, I would personally hang on His every word.

So I guess I would really have a conflict on my hands. Talk about a break from what you are comfortable with. My comfort zone doesn't really include a few madmen and bloodthirsty mobs.

It's just a really interesting thought to me. I mean, as long as I've lived, I'm never sat down and seriously put myself into His time and see how I would react. I guess I will never fully know, but I have some sort of idea because I am, well, me. I don't know, just something to think about.

Doo doo doo, doo do doo, doo do doo, do do!!

I have no idea what to write about. I've had no idea what to write about all week, and the only reason I am posting this is because I feel like I need to continue to update my blog or else I might forget about it. I wouldn't forget about it if I had a lot to write about, but lately, I don't.

I applied for Color Me Mine, so I'm hoping to get a call back from them soon.

I really want to do another show, but the only show I know of that is in the works is Much Ado About Nothing at Las Po. I would enjoy doing something for that show, but apparently you have to be part of a certain class to be in the production, sooooo I don't think that's going to happen.

I saw Toy Story 3 last night! I absolutely loved it and it is easily in my top 5 of favorite movies! I loved Chuckles the Clown! Oh, he was so funny.

Gosh, I'm bored. I hope something interesting happens soon so I'll have something to write about.

RAWR!

*Contented Sigh*

I am home from an amazing weekend! Over the past three days, I was kicking with my drama friends up in Ashland, Oregon for the Oregon Shakespeare Festival. The festival is a huge, 10 month long event dedicated to the Bard himself, William Shakespeare. Now just because the festival is named after Shakespeare, his plays aren't the only ones shown there. For instance, Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice was shown. A total of eleven plays were being performed during this event, which is amazing in itself.

Let's recap on the weekend, shall we?

Friday, June 18th.

After waking up at around 5:15 in the morning, I joined my fellow Dramies at Sheena's house. We left her house around 6 and hit the road for a very long, very interesting 6 hour car trip to Ashland. Once we arrived at the hotel, the guys loaded their stuff into the room, while the girls found out that the hotel screwed up our reservations and that they had to find another hotel to spend the night in. After that we grabbed some lunch at a place called The Munchies. We then went to see our first show, "Pride and Prejudice", which was really good and a lot funnier than I thought it would be! We ate some more good food at a Standing Stone Brewing Co., and then sat down again for a showing of "Hamlet" which, apart from a strange take on a certain play scene, absolutely amazed me! Tired from our first day, we walked back to our hotels chatting about the show.

Saturday, June 19th.

Waking up at 7 on vacation was not quite as much fun as you would think, but we did it. We got up that early in order to go white water rafting down the Klamath River. Waiting for the girls, we quickly ran over to Puck's for some donuts! I am a donut freak, so that made me really happy. Once the girls showed up, we got in the van that would take us to where we start rafting, and headed out. Upon arriving at the starting location, we realized how cold it was. It was absolutely freezing, but it got a lot better once we put on our wetsuits and started rafting. My raft consisted of Lish, Stephanie, two people we didn't even know, the guide, and myself. The rafting was super fun when we went through the level 4 rapids, and fairly quiet during the moments of drifting, which was ok, because it gave me time to appreciate the beautiful scenery. After rafting, we went back to our rooms to take showers, change into warm clothes, yada yada yada. We met back up with the girls and ate at a japanese restaurant called Kobe's and had some really good Yakitori (Teryaki Grilled Chicken), Miso soup, and California Rolls. Then we went and saw "Henry IV Part 1". The show was alright, but I think I would've appreciated it more if I hadn't been so cold and tired, considering that we were sitting in an outdoor Elizabethan Theatre. It actually started to rain on the actors! After the show, we walked back to the hotel, and as tired and ready to sleep as I was, it was probably the nicest walk of the trip.

Sunday, June 20th.

We woke up around 8:30 to pack for the ride home. I ended up being the only one who took a shower, but that was ok, because I wasn't about to be smelly for the whole day. Once we packed everything into the car, we headed over to a backstage tour of the multiple theaters at the festival, led by the lead actress of "Pride and Prejudice". I got some nice pictures and learned some really cool stuff, which was nice. We had lunch at a pizza place which I can't remember the name of and had some really good pizza while playing a couple games of pool. Our show for that day was "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof", which ended up being probably my favorite show of the trip. Then we got in the car and headed back home.

Needless to say, it was a fantastic trip and I had so much fun. I was indeed sad for it to be over. I loved the area! The weather and the amount of trees in Ashland just blew me away. I was so glad I went and I'm gonna remember this for a very long time.

Drama Trip Round 2!

I am currently packing my quite small backpack for a trip with the Drama kids to Oregon! We are going up to Ashland to watch some shows and go white water rafting. It's going to be a great time and I'm super excited for it, but right now I'm having a bit of a dilemma.

You see, I have two bags to choose from that I can bring with me to Oregon. One is a normal, run of the mill backpack, while the other is a colossal duffle bag. I don't want to bring either, because one is too small, and one is too big. I need one that's just right. If I bring the backpack, I might not have enough room to bring enough clothes for the weekend, but if I bring the duffle bag, it'll be huge and we are trying to safe as much space in whatever vehicle we choose to drive up in. So I'll have to decide what to do with that.

Anyway, I'm stoked for the trip and I hope it turns out as great as it's cracked up to be! I've got high hopes for this one!

I'm having to let go.

Today, it hit me.

Earlier today, I attended what my friends and I call a Harry Potter Clue Smackdown! It's basically just a fun way for us all to get our competitiveness out. It consisted of 4 friends (one of those being an old teacher of mine) and I sitting in a Starbucks for four hours playing one of our favorite boardgames: Harry Potter Clue.

It was such a great time, and I loved it, but I realized something while I was there. You see, a few lines were thrown around. Stuff like "Oh, yeah, I forgot! You guys aren't in high school anymore!" and "It's college, they won't care." And it made me realize that we are starting our lives. We really aren't in high school anymore!

Since the end of the school year I've been dreading the day all of my friends leave for college, but today I came to find out that I'm ok with it. I've finally accepted the fact that people are going to be leaving me come September, and that's ok, because we all have our lives to live.

Now, that doesn't mean I'm going to step aside and just let friendships die. I'm going to spend this summer building my friendships and relationship to the best of my abilities, but when it comes time for people to leave, I'm going to let them go and try and continue our friendship as best as I can from afar. Sure, I'll still be devastated when they leave, but that's how life goes.

I'm ok with it. :)

Let's take a look at some writing, shall we?

Alright, so this is something I wrote just recently when it came to my mind. It's a prologue for a bigger storyline that I've had formulating in my head for quite some time now. Take a look! Oh, it's pretty long, but I couldn't figure out how to make this a link to a document, so this is what we get.

Prologue

Raymund was scared.

He had been at home with his family eating a dinner which happened to be one of the best he had cooked in years. His wife, Koni, had made dinner last night, so this night was his turn.

That was the deal they worked out quite a while ago. Another plan which had proven successful. Their whole marriage had been based on plans and working out decisions together, and they found that it was a very efficient and happy way to make a relationship work.

And as much as their family always thought ahead, this one time was different.

They had not planned to take a walk through the lush hawaiian jungles after dinner, but decided in a spontaneous whim to do so. The walk was relaxing. Raymund and Koni strolling side by side, hand in hand.

Heading into a very dense part of the jungle, the pair came across a group of people. Raymund thought this was out of the ordinary, but many tourists had been visiting the island lately and the younger crowd tended to be unusual. They would be the kind of people to stand in a group in the middle of a jungle.

As Raymund and his wife walked by, he noticed that the group of men seemed to be in fact two groups. One being dressed very casual, in shorts, sandals, and button up shirts. The other group was dressed in either all black or greens that blended in with the surrounding flora. The groups were facing each other, with six or seven men on either side, and with four men in the middle. One man dressed in the dark decor of the men behind him on his side, one dressed in a suit, and the other two dressed casual like the group behind them.

The four men in the middle were standing very close and speaking barely above a whisper. The two business-like men were handing wrapped packages to the casually dressed pair, and in turn handed the business-like men a suitcase.

A hand off, Raymund thought, in the middle of the jungle? Things were starting to become more than unusual. Raymund had never even heard of things like this going on in the dense thickets of Hawaii. Weren’t hand off’s usually associated with drugs? Tourists were going much to far these days! Raymund decided he wasn’t going to just stand around and do nothing. He noticed his arrogance was coming back to the surface, but he ignored it. He decided that enough was enough.

Raymund let go of Koni’s hand, and before she could say a word, started off towards the group.

But then he noticed something that struck fear into his heart. These men we armed. They had firearms with them and were holding them at their sides, ready to be used when needed. This situation had become much more grave than Raymund first thought. He stopped himself before he went any further, with the intention of turning around and briskly walking back home.

But then two men turned his way.

Raymund’s heart skipped a beat and he stopped dead in his tracks. Sweat instantly started to run down his forehead. His instincts were to pop his knuckles, which he always did when he became nervous or agitated, but his fear dominated his bad habits.

One man looked his way. . . And then turned around to continue supervising the trade. But the other’s eyes searched in the couple’s direction, looking for any activity. It must’ve been darker than Raymund had thought, because the men didn’t seem to have noticed him. He was hoping Koni was staying as quiet and as still as he was, but then again, she was sometimes even more curious than he. Raymund wanted to get back to where Koni was standing so they could figure out what to do, but he knew he couldn’t just turn around and stroll toward her. He decided he was going to try and inch his way back as slowly and as stealthily as he possibly could.

He took a deep breath. Inhale. Exhale. Then he almost imperceptibly took a step back.

No reaction from the man still staring in his direction.

Another step.

Nothing.

One more step.

Crack!

Raymund heard Koni make a small noise and he felt as if he had a heart attack right there on the spot. He quickly looked down to see that he had stepped on a branch, which had broken in two instantly. He looked back up at the men. The one that had been watching them started to slowly walk forward, and a few other men looked at him and seemed to be asking what he was doing.

Then the man stopped, raised his rifle, and fired one round in the pair’s direction.

Raymund instantly dropped to the ground and heard his wife do the same. He hadn’t been shot, but he knew he had shown the men their position, and he heard them starting to shout. He got on his hands and knees, and then looked up to see the large group of men surrounding him and his wife.

Raymund didn’t know what to do. He wanted to speak, but he wasn’t sure if the men spoke Hawaiian, or even English for that matter. Besides, that would probably just irritate them anyway, so he stayed silent. Not speaking at all and staying alive was much better than trying to make peace and being shot.

Then the man in the suit walked through the small crowd of men and knelt in front of Raymund.

“Excuse us, sir, but can we help you in some way shape or form?”

Raymund looked down to the ground and stayed silent.

The man’s tone changed from calm to fierce. “I’m waiting for an answer, old man, what do you think you are doing here?!”

“. . . My-my wife and I were just taking a walk along one of our favorite paths. We didn’t expect-”

“Didn’t expect what? What did you see?”

“I, we. . . we didn’t see anything.”

“Nothing at all?”

Raymund always knew he was a bad liar.

“That’s what I thought. Alright boys, we’ve got two more contestants! Round ‘em up!”

Raymund didn’t see the man walk up to his right, but he felt the sharp blow against his head as his body plummeted to the ground. His vision was hazy and his ears were ringing, but he vaguely remembered hearing the man in the suit apologizing to someone about an inconvenience. The next thing he knew, some sort of cloth or bag was thrown over his head and his sight was completely gone.

Then a few moments later, he completely lost consciousness.

~ ~ ~

Raymund was scared.

He had been kidnapped by what seemed to be a gang of sorts. They had appeared violent, and seeing as he had not heard his Koni make any sort of noise during the struggle, he was scared as to if she was ok or not. He had no idea where he was because he had been both unconscious and blindfolded for who knows how long. And to top it all off, his head never hurt as much as it did right now.

Raymund was scared, and who wouldn’t be?

He was told to stand up, and when he did, he almost fell over from disorientation. He was then escorted down what felt like a downward slope and was led across something wooden. He only knew that by how the boards creaked under his feet. He assumed he was on a sort of boat or dock, as he could hear water lapping up against a hard surface.

He was stopped, and something started to feel around his body. He heard information about himself being reported back to another person.

“. . . Tall. Thin. . . Weak arms, but his legs seem to be in good shape. . . .”

A pause.

“. . . Yes, and the woman seems to be the same. Both have virtually no upper body strength, but they could probably run a marathon.”

Then his vision came back to him in a blinding sensation that made his head throb even worse. It took him a moment to get used to the sunlight, but he was grateful that his sense of sight had been granted back to him. He looked over to see Koni, beaten and bleeding from the mouth, staring back at him. It was a glare that was fixed onto her face, one that he hadn’t seen in quite a long time. Did she think this was his fault?

“If you both could look in my direction, thank you.”

Another man in a suit, different than the man who captured them, stood in front of them with his hands behind his back. He was shadowed by two guards, both armed.

“Welcome to the Island. It has other names, but none that you need to worry about. It seems as though you two were caught spying on a little. . . endeavor of ours, yes?”

Keeping quiet kept them both alive before, maybe it would work again.

“No answer. Which, of course, is perfectly reasonable. You were forced against your will to an unfamiliar place. It would only make sense that you would want to learn more about your surroundings before you venture any further. Allow me to do you a favor and tell you what you obviously want to know: why are you here? You are here because you stuck your nose into our business. Curiosity is a very dangerous thing, which you are about to experience the hard way. Why? Because you are a troublemaker!”

The man signaled to whoever was holding him, and his captor hit him in the stomach, causing him to bend over. The man then grabbed Raymund’s head and thrust him back, past a proper standing position, into a stance that made him almost bend backward. Then the man got very close to Raymund’s face, still in his grip, and spat “And we have a way to deal with troublemakers like you.”

The man hit Raymund across the face his his other hand, turned around, and walked back to his earlier position. “You are going to be entered into a sort of competition. An Olympics of sorts, if you will. You will be put into an arena with many other troublemakers just like yourself and pitted against some of the most frightening men you will ever meet in your life. If you perform well against them, you just might survive to see another day.”

Raymund was furious. Who was this man to make him do something against his will? He could no longer hold his tongue. He could feel his very sanity tearing with each passing moment.

“And if we refuse?” Raymund spat at the man.

The man in the suit turned around. “You won’t refuse.”

“How do you know? As long as I have something left to live for, I will never give in to the likes of you.”

The man stared at Raymund for a few moments, then turned to the guard on his left and said “How many more contestants did you say we needed?”

“One, sir.”

“Right. We don’t need the woman.”

Raymund felt rather than saw the two guards behind him and Koni back away. His eyes were fixed with loathing on the man in the suit. Then the guard behind the suited man pulled out a pistol, took aim, and fired the gun.

The bullet went straight through Koni’s forehead, and as her lifeless body fell sideways off the dock and into the water, Raymund crumpled to the ground.

If he hadn’t spoken. If he had just kept quiet and didn’t say a word, he would still have his Koni by his side.

“There.” the man said, “Now you have nothing left to live for.” The man knelt down to Raymund’s level.

“Welcome to the Pain Trials.”

Then he stood up and walked away. The guards that were behind him and his wife grabbed hold of Raymund and dragged him deeper into the jungle. And as Raymund wept for his lost wife and his own stupidity, he lost the will to live, and allowed the men to carry him to what would soon be his certain death.

How did you end up in that crowd?

This is probably one of my favorite lines from any song I've ever heard. It's also one of my favorite songs. Yellowcard really was aiming their sights at situations like mine when they wrote "Five Becomes Four", which is basically a song about someone talking about a friend/loved one who went down a completely different path than the narrator, and now the narrator is pleading to his long lost friend for answers as to what happened between them.

The chorus reads: Did you run away? Did you fall apart? Did you see yourself for what you are? Will you be looking for it anymore when five becomes four? When you're all alone with the melody do you close your eyes and think of me? Will you still hear my singing anymore when five becomes four?

I can really relate to this song, as I had a best friend whom I've lost to the "wrong crowd". His name was Jeremy, and we were seriously the best of friends from 6th grade through Freshman year in high school. We would hang out all the time, we loved the same music, the same food, the same television shows, the same girls, the same style. We had an idea for a band we wanted to start, "Sunday, Only". We even talked about how we would make sure we went to college in the same area and where we would live so we could still keep in touch. We were basically the same person. For a while anyway. But for the time being, we had plans for the future, and we intended to see them out to the end.

Once Freshman year rolled around, we still hung out a lot, but he started to get other friends too. I had a hunch that these people were bad news, but what could I say to the guy? "You're heading down the wrong path and if you continue to, I'm going to have to stop hanging out with you"? Was that what I was supposed to say? Well now that I'm older, I realize that I should have said exactly that, but I was scared to lose my best friend, so I didn't.

Sophomore year came and he was just in too deep, so to speak. He had too many friends, too many connections, to drugs and other unhealthy things. We started having arguments about everything and then we just stopped talking. I hated it. I still hate it, and I think about it a lot. Where is he now? I'm not entirely sure. Was kicked out of Tracy high, out of West High, out of Stein. I heard he was graduating from Delta Charter or something this year, and good for him. Maybe he's going somewhere.

But seriously though, I was supposed to be his best friend and after we stopped talking, I just stopped caring. Why did I stop caring? I don't know. Ok, I didn't stop caring, but I couldn't take the constant worry. What I do know is, "Five Becomes Four" tells my story. And as sad as I am about what happened between Jeremy and I, I can say without the shadow of a doubt that I do not, and never will, regret my decision to cut my friendship with him. Because in the end, I'd rather not have gone down with him. It sounds heartless, but it's far from it, because I still pray for him and wish we had both handled things a bit differently. Curious how plans change, right? Not funny how they change, not sad how they change, just curious.

"When you were down, I was around. Why would you try and hurt me now?"

I figured it out. I can see again.

I've been really confused lately. And I mean really confused. But today, I was able to address the problem and now I feel so much better, like a ginormous weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I feel lighter than I've felt in about a week, and it feels great! So thank you.

Well, that's it. Yup, that's the goal of this particular post, done and over with. But as I don't feel this was a sufficient post, let's brainstorm for the next few, shall we?

Well, I wanted to post a monologue I wrote during a writing workshop at the Ontario convention this year. Man, was that a fun couple of days. I wish I could re-live that weekend. I also wanted to post some of my writing I've been working on this summer. I had an idea for a story, and if you ask me, it's one of my best. It's also been the one idea I've really been able to expand upon, as I have a fairly thought out storyline, a theme, characters, and conflicts all buzzing around in my mind. I'm excited to write more of it, but I've still got to think through some ideas.

So I'm sure I'll post some of that soon, but I've just got to decide when. Alright... bye now.

As if to say, he doesn't like chocolate.

So, lately I've been stealing my friend's idea of using song lyrics for titles of a blog post, but I think it's a really great idea, so I'm going to continue stealing her idea. Sorry, Stephanie. Ok, I'm not sorry, but I hope you don't mind. ;)

I've also been writing about music a lot more lately, but that's because I've gotten more time to hang with Ranbir, and as he is my pretend band member (we jam together), it would make sense that we get together to play music. Recently we've been playing some pretty chill music, and I really have a thing for that kind of stuff. Rookie of the Year, Explosions in the Sky, This Will Destroy You, Bloc Party; all of that kind of stuff puts me in a mood to just sit and make believe I'm in my sort of sanctuary.

Actually, now that I think about it, I really do think of a sanctuary a lot. I picture this sort oceanfront town, with a lot of trees. And I mean a lot. These trees almost completely obscure the beautiful east coast style architecture of the homes and shops that make up this quaint town. The streets are long, winding, and completely safe to walk down in the evening. Old New England style lampposts shine down dim light on the sidewalks, and the trees there make the amazing sunsets even more beautiful. The town is filled with some of the most interesting people you will ever meet, with people who play the most beautiful acoustic sets you will ever hear, and write the most captivating literature you will ever read.

It is a complete fantasy, of course, but it's my dream world, and I love it.

Oh, and I've also been playing tennis a lot, which is really great, because I get to do it with some amazing friends. And I'm getting better!

Well, this post was really random, but that's kinda how my life has been feeling lately. Unexpected and totally unforeseen, in good and bad ways.

And the moon brings a sun in the morning.

For as long as I can remember, an on going trend in my life has been finding something good and messing it up. Now, that doesn't happen all the time, but it happens enough for me to notice it and say "dang it, Brennan", and try and either make it better or forget about it.

This past year, though, it seems that certain trend had up and left from my life, which was completely fine with me. The whole year was full of great things that I never even got close to messing up. But now that summer's arrived, I have this feeling that it's making its all too familiar come back. Again, it's not a constant thing.

In fact, a few friends and I had a jam/game night last night, and it was great! Grant it, I would've liked a few of my other friends to have been there to make it perfect, but they couldn't come. Anyway, we really like this band Explosions in the Sky and this one song in particular, "Your Hand in Mine", we are obsessed over, so we decided to learn it and jam. And that's just what we did; we learned the guitar parts, created a bass part, and played it! It felt great, and the song gives off such a nostalgic feeling that you really feel like you are playing a piece of art.

It was a great night, and I hope that the rest of the summer turns out like it, because I would prefer the "failure" trend not rear it's ugly head again.

The sun's in the sky; it makes for happy endings.

I'm currently listening to "She's Got You High" by a former band known as Mumm-Ra, and it is a great song. I say former band, because apparently the group broke up back in 2008 due to some unknown reason. I tend to get really disappointed when I discover a band that I really like and find out that they don't exist anymore. I feel as if I've missed the boat, so to speak. I listen to one of their songs and I really like it so I look them up on iTunes to see if I like any more of their stuff only to find that they aren't on iTunes. So I look them up on Wikipedia, my all knowing mentor of everything in the world (I heart you Wikipedia, even if most teachers don't), and find out that they broke up already. There's this lovely and very heart felt message to all of their fans who supported them for 8 years and I realize with a heavy heart that I am not one of those fans that was addressed so sincerely. Yes, I'm still a fan, but I'm a late bloomer, which seems to be a very prominent theme in my life, and I'm not ok with settling for that.

So, Mumm-Ra, if you are by any chance in the world reading this, get back together for the sake of a lonely late bloomer like myself! I know the chances are slim, but I can dream can't I?

On another note, the new Rookie of the Year album "The Most Beautiful" comes out tomorrow, and I am stoked for it! I have no iTunes money, so I don't know how I'm going to get the album, but at least I can listen to it on YouTube! Oh, how I love technology! Mumm-Ra, seriously though, get back together. Now. Please. I'll buy you a pizza.

The Art of Human Violence

If that isn't already a title of a book, I swear I'm going to write that one day. I'm sitting here at my laptop in my room at 11:30 in the evening listening to some of the most relaxing music I've ever heard, and yet my heart is beating against my chest like a million amplifiers. I'm sitting here trying to make reason out of the very real act of violence and hatred.

I come home today from a very full, very fun afternoon and evening with some of my closest friends to hear that one of them is in a very dangerous situation tonight. He is currently holed up in his room, begging support from fellow friends, praying to a God that he may or may not believe in, and overlooking a small cache of dismantled weapons for fear of what might happen to his family. A certain person at his house has fallen slave to the demon drink, and has caused a sort of dangerous situation at his home. The sad part is: My good friend can't and won't leave the house.

What is going on through that man's mind right now, hmm? What evil possession is taking over this man's consciousness to do such a thing? I mean, that is the only explanation I can see; that this man must be possessed. What person would voluntarily do this to his own blood? I don't know. It makes me angry to think about it too, because this kid is such a nice person and has had to go through a lot. He doesn't deserve this; nobody deserves this. Yet it happens all the time. Why though? When Adam & Eve ate the apple, was that really my friend's fault? Is his punishment being locked in a room with several weapons praying that his drunken family member won't try and attack him next?

It scares me. I'm scared for him, and there's nothing I can do about it. My friend has asked me to pray for him and that's exactly what I'm going to do, because that's the only thing I can do. What a world we live in, huh? Praying to live long enough to see the light break the darkness of the previous day. It seems a bit unfair to me but, then again, when was life ever fair?

I can't do this without you so take heart, 'cause you know that you've got mine.

This last school year was amazing, with so many new experiences and friends, and it was easily my favorite year in public schooling. I told myself that I would bring those friends and experiences into this summer, as I was sure that it would make things a little more interesting than the typical summer. So far, it's been amazing, and I'm so thankful for having the opportunity to spend a summer with these people!

I've always had trouble keeping in touch with people, even when they live in the same town as me, because I tend to meet a new group of people and focus more on making new friends than keeping old ones. Maybe that's because I'm always afraid I will have a hard time making new friends? I don't know, but it tends to happen that way. I feel like that's not going to happen with this group, this family, of people that I surround myself with.

So although it's a short post, it's a meaningful one! I really look forward to the summer. Oh, and for those of you who haven't heard it yet; Yeeaauugghh!!!

With cards down and guns drawn, this is it.

Oh, yes, my friends, my nerd side is showing. I have seen the gaming light and I must share the good news with the world! Plus, I've always wanted to write a video game review. Yesterday, I donned my cowboy hat and gun holster, and took on the rugged, unforgiving wasteland that is the early 1900's Western United States in Red Dead Redemption.

The game is set in 1911, right before the first world war, in small towns around the "Wild West" and Mexico. In the single player campaign, you play as outlaw John Marston, a former gang leader whose previous life consisted of robbing banks, holding train passengers hostage, and killing anyone who got in his way. Because of his lawless former self, John's family is now in danger, and he must either kill or subdue his previous gang members in order to protect his family. Despite his noble mission, karma seems to have played its hand, and it seems as if the whole of the West wants something from him; be it his help or his life.

Right off the bat, you learn how to break and ride a horse, shoot a gun, lasso and hogtie an enemy, and play side games such as poker and horseshoe. The single player campaign is a great way to learn the controls, which can be a little confusing as certain controls only apply to certain situations, and may change depending on what you are doing. The targeting system can take a little getting used to, but once you set yourself down and seek out missions which require you to hunt down bandits, you quickly start to learn how to shoot like a pro. One of the more interesting things about combat in RDR is the simple fact that it works like real life. If you shoot a bandit in the leg, he is going to fall over and try to limp away. If you shoot him in the hand, he drops his gun and takes off running, and of course, if you shoot them in any vital part of the body, it's lights out. And because the game is a 3rd person platform shooter, you are allowed to take cover and pop out in order to fire at the target, which makes the combat system seem pretty life like.

Now, the campaign is incredibly well thought out and very captivating, but for the most part it's got nothing on Uncharted 2. No, where this game shines is the multiplayer. In Red Dead Redemption, you can take a custom character of your choice into the full single player campaign world without the campaign. You can do absolutely everything that you can do in the campaign, but you can do this with friends online. Create posses of 2 to 8 people, raid a mine, steal their gold, and take off. Get 5 other friends together and play a high stakes game of poker. There is so much you can do in the multiplayer, including hunting, shootouts, and taking over gang hideouts. And just like any other online multiplayer shooter, you quickly join in 16 player matches that range from a capture-the-flag type game to a normal style deathmatch, called Shootout. All of this gives you experience, which leads to better horses, guns, and different characters that you can use in the multiplayer world.

Basically, this game is quite amazing, and I think that each and every one of my none existent readers should try this game if you own an PS3 or a 360. Now, just because this game is one of the best I've ever played before, that doesn't mean that it is perfect. Frame rates sometimes run slow, and as beautiful as the world around you is, (and believe me, the stars at night alone are captivating) the character models don't look nearly as good as some other games, and I really could do without some of the language in the game. Still, the complaints are little and the enjoyment is huge. Red Dead Redemption may not be classified as a new type of shooter, it will always be seen as one of the best. Rockstar, you've finally reached what you were trying to do with Grand Theft Auto. And for that, I take my hat off to you, ladies and gentlemen.

Photos courtesy of IGN.com